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Sound familiar? I thought so. That’s why, whether you’re a Florida resident or a visitor to the state, you simply must check out the Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino in Hollywood, owned and operated by The Seminole Tribe of Florida.

For the third year in a row, the American Automobile Association (AAA) bestowed its prestigious Four Diamond rating to this 500-room hotel. With 17 restaurants and lounges, 30,000-square feet of meeting room space, a full-service European-style spa, 22 retail shops and 11 nightclubs in a complex known as Seminole Paradise (whew!) why would you need to leave the premises?.

I can tell you first-hand, you won’t want to leave. Read on and I’ll take you on a tour of everything this destination resort has to offer, beginning from the moment you first pull up to the drive and see the 50-foot neon guitar modeled after one played by Jimi Hendrix.

Sure, every resort has valet parking, but do they have a car wash and detail service? The Seminole Auto Salon is a hand car wash and auto-detail service open to the public. When I pulled up to the hotel’s entrance, I left my car in their care. When I checked out, my fully detailed ride was brought around to the entrance. How cool is that? I still have the guitar-shaped air freshener hanging from my rearview mirror. 

I noticed the high energy vibe of this resort from the moment I walked into the lobby. Music memorabilia lines the walls (think iconic images of Elvis, the Beatles, the Bee Gees, Madonna, Elton John, Aerosmith, the Who, the Rolling Stones, as well as South Florida's Gloria Estefan) while live music permeates the air with tunes from local musicians playing in the lobby bar. They play almost continually so I caught quite a few of the acts. They were all great—so good, in fact, that the surrounding couches and chairs were nearly always full with people listening to the music, while folks whirled and twirled on the small dance floor at all hours of the day and night.

At the Hard Rock, you’ll be a rock star for a night—or at least sleep in a rock-star themed room like I did. The contemporary guest rooms are all decorated with a musical theme and include unique extras like Tivoli stereo and CD systems, ultra-luxury beds with Egyptian cotton linens, spa robes, T-1 direct Internet access and luxurious bathrooms. All these things are nice, but c’mon, we’re not here to sleep.

After checking out my room, I headed down to the shimmering four-acre, lagoon-style pool area. Who needs the beach here when the zero-entry pool is surrounded by sand. Waterfalls, hot tubs and a shallow pool splished and splashed with happy-go-lucky guests. But the crowning touch was the private poolside cabanas built into traditional Seminole “chickees,” which come equipped with televisions and refrigerators. You can sip a cocktail, watch TV and get a tan all at the same time – the ultimate indulgence. There’s a casual restaurant known for its coconut shrimp and oversized cocktails, so start there, but I’d definitely recommend the burger and onion rings – simply fantastic.

The only problem with the food at Hard Rock is deciding where to eat. On-site, you’ll find:

• Blue Plate, a diner-style restaurant
• The Hard Rock Cafe Hollywood
• The Council Oak, a prestigious steak and seafood restaurant named for the old oak tree where early members of the Seminole Tribal Council regularly met
• Constant Grind, a coffee and tea shop
• The Beach Club with poolside dining
• The 250-seat food court featuring a variety of quick food

However, outside the hotel proper you’ll find the dining, entertainment and shopping complex known as Seminole Paradise, where you’ll find 17 more restaurants including:

• Tequila Ranch, offering Mexican favorites (and a mechanical bull!)
• Tatu, a bi-level restaurant that features Asian-fusion dining in a hip and trendy atmosphere
• Renegade Barbeque, serving up Southwestern and Florida food
• Hooters. No explanation needed
• Blue Point Ocean Grill, with fresh seafood and raw bar

I opted for the upscale Council Oak restaurant. Executive Chef Marsha Orosco offers genuine, 100% USDA prime dry-aged stockyard beef from a butcher shop located in the front of the restaurant. Peek into the window that fronts the casino and you can see the beef hanging in the cooler.

Known primarily as a steakhouse, the Council Oak also serves some of the freshest seafood anywhere. Not one to discriminate, I decided to test out the surf and turf. I started with the stone crab claws and followed that up with a cowboy steak that practically cut itself, it was so tender. The Council Oak also features an extensive wine-by-the-glass selection and live entertainment nightly in a separate lounge area. My server, Tim, was the type of server who takes his profession to a higher level. Not only did he explain all the dishes I inquired about to perfection, he was also knowledgeable about wines and made excellent suggestions as far as they and dessert were concerned – crème brulee, if you’re interested.

By night, the 300,000-square foot Seminole Paradise complex draws the local areas’ party crowd, who flock to 11 high-energy nightclubs including Pangaea, SPIRITS, Gryphon, and Passion. There’s also the impressive 5,500-seat Hard Rock Live and The Improv Comedy Club.

With only one night at the resort, I couldn’t do them all — but that wasn’t going to stop me from trying. I visited Passion Nightclub, a 16,000-square foot, multi-level nightclub with two floors and five different rooms, each with a separate VIP bottle section.

Theme nights live on at Passion. Wednesdays are A Ritmo Latino nights, Friday is Ladies' Night, Saturdays include Latin dance music and Sunday is Latin night with salsa, merengue, bachata, reggaeton and more. 

My next stop was SPIRITS, a multi-level mega nightclub and the largest of all clubs in Seminole Paradise. SPIRITS has played host to an array of celebrities and athletes including Alonzo Mourning, Dwayne Wade, Gabrielle Union, Jesse Metcalfe, The Sopranos cast, Michael Irvin and more. I loved that the venue was built as three clubs in one, with each room having a different theme and feel. Call ahead to get the royal treatment with a VIP reservation.

Both venues were packed when I was there and the music was thumping. Conversation was not an option, but who goes to a club to talk? If I didn’t know better, I would have thought that I was in South Beach.

Whichever nightlife venue you choose, be aware that security is always present in the form of large gentlemen in dark suits who card everyone and insure that guests are properly dressed. The fun starts at about 11 p.m. at all venues, but I suggest getting there earlier in order to get prime seats – or any seats, come to think of it. Most clubs stay open till 5 a.m. 

After the meals and the late night, I was in dire need of a spa treatment, so I headed up to the Contour Spa, which offers a full range of facials, body massages, Turkish baths and water therapies. Owner Fanit Panofsky is no stranger to South Florida. For 24 years, she has owned and operated the Contour Day Spa in Plantation, which has become known as the center for rejuvenation, relaxation and renewal, wrapped up in penultimate pampering.

I quickly learned that the Hard Rock location is a favorite with locals, who come for such spa specialties as the “Tranquility Package,” where guests begin with a hand and foot reflexology, then soak in a hydrotherapy bath, enjoy a milk and honey body scrub in the Hamman, then de-stress with a 50-minute Swedish massage, hair wash and style.

I opted for the Swedish massage (which, by the way, was fab), and then spent some time in the steam room. Unlike some other spa steam rooms that choke out a few puffs of mist every now and then, this one kept up a constant stream of steam and there was plenty of room for myself and the three other ladies who were basking in the heat with me. 

You knew I’d get here eventually, didn’t you? Seminole Paradise is also home to 22 retail shops like Cache, Brookstone, Ritchie Swimwear and White House/Black Market. I checked them all out, including a shop called Shooz, which has a sister store at the Forum Shop in Las Vegas and carries the latest shoes, handbags and accessories.  The shoe boutique specializes in the ladies shoes from Donald Pliner, Via Spiga, BCBG, Betsey Johnson, J-Lo, Beverly Feldman and more. I spent a good while trying on the killer boots they had in stock – until I remembered that I live in Florida and would most likely never get the chance to wear them. (The price we pay for living in this sunny paradise, right?) 

Last but not least, there’s the casino which, you’ll be glad to know, pays $10 million on an average day. The casino is open every day, 24 hours a day, and has nearly 2,500 gaming machines in almost any denomination, from a penny a pop to the pricier payouts. All the machines are coin-free and feature the "Easy Ticket" system. Simply hit the cash-out button from one machine, remove your ticket and take it right over to the next machine to play some more or cash out. There is one non-smoking room, with smoking permitted in the rest of the gaming rooms.

As to cards, the 50-table poker area was constantly busy with people playing everything from Seven-Card Stud and Texas Hold 'em to Omaha. And the casino regularly hosts poker tournaments and cash and car giveaways.

If you’re thinking about a visit to the Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino (and who isn’t at this point?), then I suggest you plan your trip to coincide with upcoming performances and events.

So when you start planning your Florida vacation, remember: Sometimes, the hotel is the destination itself.